I was about to look for an image of a broken heart in Google so I can post it on my Love Story part 2, but when I saw the results I was like...NO! I am not as emotional as I was before and it's maybe because I have gone through a lot that I have gotten used to it. LOL. From family dramas, friendship issues and broken lovelife that everytime I see emotional/problematic posts in Facebook and "emo" pictures make me really cringe! So much for that.. here's my 2nd part of love story.
I can say that I have my fair-share of broken heart and mending it. I was too mind over heart though that it doesn't show but too hard to get over because I would conceal it. No, I don't cry and I cant even remember when was the last time I cried because of it. I have experienced two types of heart breaks so far..hurting someone, and being hurt by someone/situation.
1.) Hurting someone I'd say is also a heart breaking thing to do, as the song goes "there's no easy way to break somebody's heart". Truth to be told, especially if that person is a close friend there is just not easy way. You have to either get hurt by yourself because you are forcing something that you do not feel, or get hurt because you know that the person is hurting. Rimond was originally a friend - only. About 10 years ago he started courting me but I only see him as a friend that time, although he never put pressure on me before but since he was really a nice guy, very kind, generous, gentleman and too good to be true I just said yes to him after about 3 years of waiting. I loved him as a friend but never a boyfriend. I had my expectations and ideals that time and Rimond was certainly not a fit. I didn't know why. There were so many times that I have mistreated him, abused his patience, totally disregarded him and chose my friends over him. I was mean and I admitted it before and I knew I was hurting him but I didn't hear any complaints instead he would keep on apologizing if we get into a misunderstanding when actually it was just an act so that he could have a reason to break up with me but didn't happen. But since he didn't complain even for a bit and I keep scolding him to get mad at me and he never did/was so I was like "argh~ im such an evil!" I didn't even know what to do with him anymore. It lasted for about 9months and I was hurting in the sense that I was hurting myself because I was with a man I didn't love, tied into something when he was not even possessive and I was hurting because he was such a good man, friend and I know he was hurting too. I was so bad but not that I didn't try. I tried, I had this mindset before that it's him, it should be him. I was so used to him being around, I was so dependent on him when I needed help with everything. But at the end of the day, something was empty. After a year together I have decided to break it up with him because I couldn't take it anymore. And guess what? He didn't give me a hard time. He was like okay...and I was like, seriously? I wasn't sure if he understood me that time, or maybe he found someone else already to easily let me go or maybe he wasn't really that into me. LOL so I didn't ask further, I told him to delete my number (which apparently he memorized), not to communicate with me in any way possible so that it would be easier for both of us to move on when to be honest I thought it was just him that needs to move on. Bad girl!
So that was it, it's not that we didn't communicate at all. We would text each other but rarely but we still call each other with our endearment even if we have broken a part. Wow, that was like a year like that and after a year we were back like lovers. Well, friends with benefits? But NO! NO! NO Sex involved. Geez! What I meant was he was still there when I needed help, when I need someone to talk to, when it rains on my way to work and he would provide me umbrella and borrow money if needed. LOL
I would also talk to him about my 2nd heartbreak. A guy that I really liked, don't you think he was also hurting then?